Handling Disappointment

Have you ever been really excited about something, and then it did not happen the way you hoped? That heavy, let-down feeling is called disappointment. Every person — children and grown-ups — feels it. What matters is what you do next.

What does disappointment feel like?

• Your chest might feel heavy or tight.
• You might want to cry, slouch, or stop trying.
• You might feel sad and a little frustrated at the same time.
• All of these feelings are okay — disappointment is not a bad feeling to have.

Healthy ways to cope with disappointment

• Take a deep breath. Slow breathing helps your body calm down so your brain can think clearly.
• Name the feeling. Say "I feel disappointed because ___." Naming it makes it smaller.
• Talk to someone. Tell a trusted adult or friend how you feel — you do not have to carry it alone.
• Try again or try something different. One "no" or one setback does not mean it is over forever.
• Do something kind for yourself. A short walk, a hug, or quiet time can help your feelings settle.

What not to do

• Do not hurt others or break things — that makes the situation worse.
• Do not tell yourself you are a failure — one disappointment does not define you.