💛 SELGrade 4Lesson 31
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Resolving Conflicts Peacefully

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Learning Objectives

  • 1Explain what conflict is and why it is normal
  • 2Describe a five-step peaceful conflict resolution process
  • 3Place the steps of conflict resolution in the correct order
  • 4Apply the resolution steps to a real or role-play conflict scenario
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Mini Lesson

Conflict happens when two or more people have different wants, needs, or views that clash. Conflict is normal — it is part of every relationship. What matters is whether you handle it in a way that is peaceful and respectful, or in a way that makes things worse.

Why Conflict is Normal

  • People are different and will not always agree.
  • Needs and feelings can clash even between close friends.
  • Conflict itself is not the problem — how you handle it is.
  • Peaceful resolution strengthens relationships; escalation weakens them.

The 5-Step Peaceful Resolution Process

  1. Calm down — take a breath and manage your emotions before you speak.
  2. Listen to each side — each person shares their view without interruption.
  3. Identify the problem — agree on what the real issue is.
  4. Find a solution together — brainstorm options both sides can accept.
  5. Agree and move forward — shake hands, make a plan, and let it go.

Escalation vs De-escalation

  • Escalation — the conflict grows: shouting, blaming, bringing in others.
  • De-escalation — the conflict shrinks: calming down, listening, finding common ground.
  • Every action you take either escalates or de-escalates the situation.
5-Step Conflict Resolution5-Step Conflict Resolution1Calm down2Listen to each side3Identify the problem4Find a solution5Agree and move forward
Escalation vs De-escalationEscalation vs De-escalationEscalationDe-escalationShoutingCalm voiceBlamingListeningBringing in othersStay focusedPersonal attacks"I feel..." statementWalking away angryAgree a solution
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Tip: Step 1 is the most important — if you skip "calm down" and speak when angry, you are likely to escalate rather than resolve the conflict.

Vocabulary
conflict
A disagreement or clash between two or more people with different wants or views.
resolve
To find a peaceful solution to a conflict or disagreement.
calm
Being in control of your emotions, not letting anger or upset drive your actions.
listen
To give full attention to what someone is saying, without interrupting.
solution
A way of solving a problem that works for everyone involved.
peaceful
Happening without violence, shouting, or harm to others.
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